THE BOTTOM LINE: Getting in touch with your inner Libertarian…and beating it about the head and neck with reality.

The Bottom Line with Avery Fenris

Imagine… sitting on the porch of your modern castle-style house. A wind and solar powered home that’s surrounded by high walls and a moat.

Yes. It’s completely off the grid.

You have a gun in your hand and a joint on your lip that is filled with marijuana you grew yourself; right next to the many rows of vegetables and fruit that, (in conjunction with your livestock) insures your family is fed almost year round.

You haven’t been to a gas station in years because the abovementioned wind and solar keep your electric vehicles filled to the brim.

All this in a world where the government is almost non-existent. You are free to let your freak flag fly and the economy is based on tangible materials like silver and gold. Death to the Fed! And why do you need a tax CUT when taxes are illegal in the first damn place!? YEAH, man! I’m DOWN.

Ron & Rand Paul: Dr. Evil and his son, Quasi-Evil

Dr. Evil and his son, Quasi-Evil.

That’s what makes Mr. Ron Paul sound so good. He may be running for the Republican nomination (which we ALL know he ain’t gonna get) but the cut of his jib is Libertarian at its roots- And our roots as Americans as well. Libertarians are the epitome of the true blooded AmeriCAN…

So why is he having such a hard time selling that dream in today’s politics? Why are people calling him crazy? Because he doesn’t want to start another war we can’t afford? Diplomacy is about the sanest idea any of the clowns in the Republican Nomination Circus has ever had.

No, the problem with Libertarianism is twofold:

Firstly, Libertarians tend to be extreme- let’s face it folks, Americans are extreme. It’s our biggest asset and weakness…kind of like what alcohol is to a party but I digress…

Libertarians tend to want to have NO government at all. They forget where that tax money goes and why we need the EPA to keep our water and air clean; or why labor and civil rights laws came about.

Actually, a lot of Republicans can be looped into this group, too (but I think they are there only because huge corporations pay them to be in it). Both groups scream about “Big Government” being wildly out of control. And while big government IS an ugly wart on Democracy, the size of government is less the problem where bad government is more the issue and corrupt government the real concern.

This can, and should, be remedied. Most people can be made to see where government is too big, too bad, or just down right criminal. We should be vigilant about that always, but “no government” (sometimes called anarchy) is out of the question. Any rational person can be made to see the importance of some authority.

Lastly, and this really strikes at the core of what Libertarianism is, no man is an island.

What I mean is… well, have you ever read The Walking Dead?

It’s a brilliant comic written by Robert Kirkman about people trying to survive a zombie apocalypse. No? Well, you really should. Or maybe you can catch the television show… just Netflix it.

Anyway, here’s a half-assed spoiler coming up…

The characters in the book begin to realize the only thing more terrifying than the dead trying to eat you alive are the things that humans turn into when things get lawless.

You see what I’m getting at here?

Let’s say you’re in your modern castle- off the grid- and unaffected by what the government has decided to or not to do. When the infra-structure goes down, the water is shit and the dollar is toilet paper…guess who’s house is going to be a shining beacon of light to the unwashed, unfed masses pouring out of defunct and dilapidated cities.

What’s that? That’s what the guns are for?
Look kid. You ain’t John McClane. Hell. Bruce Willis ain’t even John McClane. You are not going to have enough bullets to keep those city-zombies off of you. They are going to catch you. Eat you. Take your shit. And when they are done, someone else is going to do it to them. And so on and so on.

There is no wall high enough and no moat wide enough to keep them off of you forever.

The only way to do that is to make sure the idiots not smart enough to get off the grid, HAVE a grid to be on. You want them occupied and happy so they don’t stack themselves against your wall to better climb over and smoke your weed.

The Bottom Line Is This:

The spirit of Libertarianism is spot on but you cannot give up on society around you or the government that regulates it. You have to make sure it’s fair, respects your freedoms and takes care of its people in a manner that is democratic. One must participate in the world to keep it off one’s back and your best weapon in a zombie apocalypse is to make sure it never happens.


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